HOW TO HANDLE DILEMMA IN LIFE !
Life as whole in a macro picture is a bundle of choices. Each and every person’s life is based on the choices they make on situations. These life choices are not just an option we make in a situation but these choices also rewires us emotionally and rationally according to the consequences we get. Every consequences we face alters our subtle logic of decision making and our belief systems. The generic practice is that if our decisions are choices turns out to be positive we tend to become more happy and rewarding and if it turns out to be negative the immediate response is to do the opposite of what we first intended, if the exact opposite cannot be done or if nothing can be done we would try to skip the whole part by diverting or pacifying ourselves. These skips or diversion what it does is that it becomes the precursors of dilemma in our thoughts and belief system.
what is dilemma ?
Dilemma is nothing but our inconclusive nature formed due to the previous negative consequence of our decisions. The subtle fear or disappointments faced due to the previous incidents which we have passed through it without addressing it fully resides and develops an inconclusive nature. dilemma is not a confusion rather an expression of fear whether the present choice or decision we are about to take will end up positive. Most people think dilemma is a form of confusion but dilemma is a state of mind where one cannot make decision based on their own beliefs or experience or rational data. In this state of mind we seek someone to affirm us on our thought process that the track is right. Most people handle dilemma by aligning themselves to the mass intellect or the usual decision made by every others in a particular situation. To put it in the simpler perspective, most times when we go to a restaurant we do not clearly know what we intend to take, even if we knew or previously decided, the dilemma starts with the menu card. The most obvious response we do is that subtly we look at other orders going on the floor and pick the most ordered food in sight. We do this not because we lack the decision making or inability to process the menu card but its a simple question of what if my choice is wrong and what if there is better option today. This is not a confusion rather a state of mind where we demand an affirmation to what we are going to proceed. It is rather easy to fetch reasons from the historic data than to be in present and validate the circumstances thats the main reason why people mostly follow the most obvious route taken.
Though it is easier to pick our reasons and validation from the historic data and the previous happenings, it may not workout as we intended because the circumstances of that day may not fully match today. The reality is that elements of yesterday can repeat today but the set of people in handling the elements will never be the same. Thats why many times even if we exactly replicate the successful pattern it might not work the way it previously worked. This can be resolved only by realising that the present is never same as that of any previous moments.
The only way to become a person with no dilemma is to understand that disappointments and rejections are common in life. There is nothing to react or seriously alter ourselves. It is because we alter ourselves so much even to a small failures in life we tend to loose our stance completely. Our brain works in a simple mechanism of reward and punish, thats the reason why we react too much to a failure or disappointments and rejections. Most positive happenings will not even last for two or three days in our life but a small happening like loosing a ten rupees can last a life time thats because we allow our brain to punish for that exact happening and constantly blame us of being careless, but that would not be the case. The only point is that, “sometimes it all happens”. If we are responsible and if there is something to learn and move on then do the same, But all the unwanted blames we keep on ourselves will only make us more indecisive and inconclusive. In terms of people, everyone has got their unique character, for anything to happen no single person can be fully responsible so there is no use in blaming our own-self. Dilemma free life is only possible when we realise todays life is based on the todays circumstances and people. Taking past more into consideration will always end up in dilemma. Experiences are useful only as an exposure but never as an exact blue print for today !!
